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A man enters a restaurant, takes a seat, and, instead of using the napkin,
takes the table cloth from the table and tucks it around his neck.The head
waiter sees it and tells the waiter to go and tell him, in a diplomatic way,
that what he did was incorrect. The waiter goes to the man and says, "Good
day to you Sir.. Would you like a shave or a haircut?".
A drunk decides to go ice fishing, so he gathers his gear and goes walking
around until he finds a big patch of ice. He heads into the center of the
ice and begins to saw a hole. All of sudden, a loud booming voice comes out
of the sky. "You will find no fish under that ice." The drunk looks around,
but sees no one. He starts sawing again. Once more, the voice speaks, "As I
said before, there are no fish under the ice." The drunk looks all around,
high and low, but can't see a single soul. He picks up the saw and tries one
more time to finish. Before he can even start cutting, the huge voice
interrupts. "I have warned you three times now. There are no fish!" The
drunk is now flustered and somewhat scared, so he asks the voice, "How do
you know there are no fish? Are you God trying to warn me?" "No", the voice
replied. "I am the manager of this hockey area!
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